The Shoe Sale

I came to a point in my career where I have to think of where I want to go. I love where I am right now and I'll be a customer service rep for 4 years this coming May 8. If that wasn't enough of a proof that I love my job, I don't know what will. But with everything going on with our group, there was an opportunity I wanted to try out. I didn't decide right away that I wanted to take it, so I needed a little push. It was a scary first step and I delayed it for a week, but when I finally decided to submit that form, I knew there was no backing out. I didn't expect it to move this fast though. I submitted my form on a Tuesday and had my first interview last Friday. It went very well as far as I can remember. The manager was able to lay out to me what she envisions for her team and I suddenly realized I wanted to be a part of it. The job itself, as described to me, was scary and nerve-wrecking, but all of us experience that. After the talk, I knew whatever I was looking for was with them. It may sound harsh and unfair, but I finally found what I was looking for. There was only one other time I felt that unexplainable ease and it was when I took the job in Sykes. As I mentioned before, that wasn't the job I wanted, but that female intuition I got pushed me to pursue the job offer and I never regretted it.

Deciding my next career move is like choosing what shoe I will buy. Either I buy the flats for comfort, or the pumps for statement. I can never choose both. I always find myself in a mess if I try to meet both functions half-way. It's always one or the other. I can never compromise. If I choose slippers just so the flats and the pumps won't feel bad if I chose one over the other, I end up miserable and the pumps and the flats will abandon me to be bought by someone else.



And now, I'm nearing the cashier's desk. I have the pumps on my left hand and the flats on my right. No decision yet. I still need that deciding factor and it's still not available for the regular consumer. No SALE sign up yet. I need the right constitution and state of mind or else, I'll mess up big time. And walking with the wrong pair of shoes is always a pain.

Happy birthday Lesuree!!!

Here comes another year for the voluptuous Lezlee to celebrate her birthday. Well, it's gonna be next week but she wanted to make sure that no one will have an excuse NOT to attend her party.
We rarely go out after office hours so this was a pure delight. Sisig, bangus, french fries, beer, HUGE glass of iced tea, chicken, squid, stories, and laughter ... mmmmm-hmmmm.
We had the celebration at 4XForce near Greenhills and it was a treat to see an albino boa (first time for me) and a really huge German Shepherd (something really weird happened to that dog's privates when I shook it hand ... it was friendly alright ... all for the wrong reasons).


Here is Mara and Enzo relinquishing the love they have been hiding from each other. This was one side of Mara we (or at least I) haven't seen before. She mixed her beer with her iced tea so when the alcohol kicked in, it came as a surprise to all of us. She started to get loud and really funny. Enzo was a cool guy and went along with it. What with the theories on alternative ways to use a skate board and what CJ would be like after a hypothetical one-night stand, it was safe to say Mara wrapped up the celebration with a lot of laughter in the air.


Here's us (thanks RJ for the picture). This is the "bizaarest" day ever. For a bunch of people who are always sensitive when cameras are around, NO ONE brought their cam! RJ's cam's battery was drained, CJ and Lezlee forgot to bring theirs, Harold's cellphone wouldn't do .... and Chad's blackberry was, well, let's just say it was edible more than anything else. :)



So what is my wish for Lezlee? Lord, wag na po sana syang maging manas. hehehe. Joke! Seriously. I wish she will be granted more challenges to strengthen her faith and more opportunities so she can have a fulfilling life. You will always be surrounded by people who love and care for you despite of everything else. Always be the sultry you. :)

The Road here and there

It's really hard to think straight when other people are putting stuff in your head (or emotions - it works both ways). Being in a crossroad and trying to decide whether to take one of the 4 available directions is no easy task. I'm not really famous for having back up plans, but I sure as hell don't want to take the next step without a plan either.

It was just a moment when I have to suck it up and decide on my own. Well, I actually already have, but it's the people's reactions around me that bothers me to some point. I know, I know, we're not supposed to listen to what other folks say (sometimes), but I think I have to weigh my options carefully here.

Anyway, as the winding road continues on its unrelenting power struggle with me to control my already chaotic life, I guess I'll just let things pass me by and for the winds of fates to carry me wherever they want me to go. Knowing myself I MIGHT struggle a little, but a little bit of maneuvering on my end will at least make me aware I have a brain to use once in a while.

Happy birthday Jerry and RJ

One thing I like about my team mates is our unwavering craving for food. When there's a reason, we eat! For this particular time, it was our celebration for Jerry's and RJ's birthdays. :)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY GUYS!!! MORE TO COME!!!

New Floor!

Lo and behold! This is my mom's home project... our new floor! :)... hmmm. Never thought I'd like lavender.

Drinking Water from a Straw

I had another round of my walking session - this time @ 12.21 AM. I slept the whole afternoon and woke up around 10.30 to watch Passengers (I liked the movie) and then decided I want hot dog. So I readied myself and made my way to the nearest 7-11 store - @12.21 AM. Most people will probably wait until the the sun came up, but nope, not me. I have been a creature of the night since I worked for "E" so night time is MY daytime. I dunno, when sky is dark and most people are asleep, I get to see the world in a different light. Those who are awake at this un-godly hour seem different as well. It's more - calming ...

Before I came home, I went to McDonald's and got myself a Blueberry Twist sundae and french fries. And because I want to burn at least some calories after all I've eaten, I walked around our block 5 times. And with the silence by the world around me, I realized how bizarre of a creature I am. I always get myself into situations that others would find crazy (Iranian + cab + getting late = disaster) or (sales guy + PA = heart ache). You can say I called for these things to happen to me. But somehow, how I managed them from tearing me apart interests me.

I still get all panicky and crazy when things don't go my way (who doesn't) but I'd like to think I have become better in handling stressful life situations (not the work-related ones). I still cry when I'm alone but most of the time, I just suck it up and move on. Not an easy thing to do, I tell you. For me, I want my life to be as easy as a hot knife cutting through butter. Or maybe not ... If so, I just want to be able to have a heart strong enough to bounce back any heart ache, but soft enough to accept changes and truth whole-heartedly.

Writer's Block

**Because I have a lot of thoughts in my head but find it unnecessary to write one whole blog entry for all of them, I decided to create this hodge-podge of an entry

I just came home from one of my morning walk sessions. I rarely do this anymore, but I enjoy the few short hours of just treading along the sidewalk bustling with joggers and casual walkers. I work the night shift so the world is a different place when the sun is up. I get to see the sun rise over the horizon countless times from the office window. It never ceases to amaze me how the sky changes from starry black, and then light orange, then blue.

As I was walking and listening to my Japanese music (I don't understand the lyrics, but I do appreciate the sounds - GO SCANDAL!), I was thinking of the things that concerns the now and the yet. It was amazing how I have exerted a lot of emotions on some of the stuff that happened to me. The major ones were my break-up with my 2-year boyfriend, my highschool graduation, my resignation from my teaching job, me getting hired in a call center, and being sent to the States.

Right now, I'm debating with myself on another career decision that could either make me or break me. I just had my performance review and so far, I did better (thank God). But a question lingered in my head - should I stay or not? I have established myself as a dependable and somewhat bitchy/flirty employee. I have had my own share of anguish and success, complaints and solutions, drama and comedy. Apparently, I did so well my boss wants to clone me. Now am not too sure if that's a good idea, but I am quite sure that if I see another me, I'M GOING TO DESTROY HER.

I am faced with the dilemma because I'm not even sure if it IS a dilemma. I know I can adapt and I give my best with what I was provided with. BUt the question was if I'm ready. Now how do you gauge if you're ready? When I quit my job as a teacher, I wasn't ready. I just did it without thinking. When I accepted the job in the call center, I wasn't ready. I just plunged in because I needed money. Now that I'm thinking and have a steady supply of income, I'm not sure what my reason will be for leaving my post. I think I just I'm too comfortable with where I am right now - but I can't determine if it's worth to stay or leave.

And then there's my friend I had an interesting "issue" with. We were just starting our friendship and it was a fine start, but then I had a rather uncomfortable encounter with his past. It was a surprising circumstance that totally caught me off guard. Confusion and hurt gripped me but deeper thinking told me not to hold any grudge. If this happened when I was younger, I could have wailed and cursed. But with all the heart aches I gained, I learned to listen to the other side of the story, provided they exert the effort to explain (which he did). But he is such a young soul, I have no idea what's going on in his head. I can't remember the last time I was this worried. I just pray and hope he is safe.

When I say best friend, it doesn't mean exclusivity. I just meant that this is a person who knows at least 85% of me and I trust completely. I only have 2 of these in my life - Manpreet and Karl. They have been my friends since highschool and their families are practically my second families. It helps that their houses are only a few blocks from where I live. They are my first line of comfort when I need it. No BS, no holds barred. They can sometimes forget that although I'm no girly-girly, I can still get hurt. But with almost a decade of friendship, I will choose no one else to be my best friends.

I guess I'll just wrap this up by saying, I am feminine and musculine. I love fashion but I despise high-end brands. I like going to fine restaurants but I can spend a day in my bedroom playing games. I wear a skirt but think like a guy (sometimes). Love me or hate me, your choice.