Sunday, April 18, 2010

Drinking Water from a Straw

I had another round of my walking session - this time @ 12.21 AM. I slept the whole afternoon and woke up around 10.30 to watch Passengers (I liked the movie) and then decided I want hot dog. So I readied myself and made my way to the nearest 7-11 store - @12.21 AM. Most people will probably wait until the the sun came up, but nope, not me. I have been a creature of the night since I worked for "E" so night time is MY daytime. I dunno, when sky is dark and most people are asleep, I get to see the world in a different light. Those who are awake at this un-godly hour seem different as well. It's more - calming ...

Before I came home, I went to McDonald's and got myself a Blueberry Twist sundae and french fries. And because I want to burn at least some calories after all I've eaten, I walked around our block 5 times. And with the silence by the world around me, I realized how bizarre of a creature I am. I always get myself into situations that others would fin
d crazy (Iranian + cab + getting late = disaster) or (sales guy + PA = heart ache). You can say I called for these things to happen to me. But somehow, how I managed them from tearing me apart interests me.

I still get all panicky and crazy when things don't go my way (who doesn't) but I'd like to think I have become better in handling stressful life situations (not the work-related ones). I still cry when I'm alone but most of the time, I just suck it up and move on. Not an easy thing to do, I tell you. For me, I want my life to be as easy as a hot knife cutting through butter. Or maybe not ... If so, I just want to be able to have a heart strong enough to
bounce back any heart ache, but soft enough to accept changes and truth whole-heartedly.


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